You finally cleared your calendar, cleared your house, and cleared your life enough to have some precious time all alone with your special sexy someone. Yay, you! Those nights or weekends of coupled bliss can be hard to come by if you have kids or careers or both. But now that you’ve made that effort, you really deserve to have the best most memorable erotic experiences you can have.
If you’re like most people, most of your sex is hurried or sticks with the basics to get you off quickly so you can get a good night’s rest. Date nights (and get-away vacays) are a perfect time to re-live the excitement and feeling of newness you had early in the relationship when you were first exploring the wonderfulness of sex together.
Let me guide you through two techniques to revive those energies and help you make every date night a beautiful and lasting memory.
⚡ MAKE IT NEW
The reason new sex is so exciting is because things are unfamiliar to you and that piques your natural erotic curiosity deep in your brain. You can help your brain get back some of that newness by simulating unfamiliarity with creative ideas. Use clothes and costumes to play out fantasies and roles to turn each other on. Bring a new toy to every date — it doesn’t have to be fancy, it can be different $10 toys you find on Amazon or some common household items that can be repurposed for erotic fun. Whatever you pick — whether it’s a feather to tease with or a wooden spoon to spank with — make it something you’ve never tried before. Silly is good too, by the way. If it puts a smile on your face when you’re in bed with your darling, you’ll know you’re doing it right.
⚡ MAKE IT MEMORABLE
most of the time, sex is about quickies or routines that, over time, don’t stand out unless something went really wrong. Odd but true, we tend to remember the accidents and screw ups in our sex life much more vividly than we remember our victories, our ecstasies and our best orgasms. So why not reverse that and bring a more affirmative energy into your relationship by honoring the times you had fantastic sex?
A great way to do it is by keeping track with a private diary. This will give you a living document of the “best of” your romantic moments. It’s a feel-good exercise that will help you stay focused on the love quotient in your relationships. It will help stoke that sexy chemistry and make you eager for more experiences you can write and dream about. Here is a short list of what should go into your diary
The calendar date and any other memorable things that happened that day that will help you remember the whole day
What did you and your partner wear to bed?
Did you bring any toys or lubes? What were they?
Did anyone say something especially funny, romantic or deep that you want to remember?
What was the best part of the date? How did you feel at that moment?
You can use your diary as a living document of your best date nights. You can return to them again and again for the rest of your life to relive the thrills. You can also study them and learn how to build your sexual repertoire by switching things up — if all your date nights are identical, maybe you can find some new ways to improve them and bring that hot sexy newness and natural curiosity back into the relationship.
